InteGRITy
I don’t think anyone wants to be THAT person. You know them too. The one that said they were going to do something or be somewhere and then the day comes and they are nowhere in sight or the task still undone. That kind of person leaves a mark on our lives because being unreliable damages trust. A spouse doubts the promises made and loses a sense of security. An employer's reputation is damaged and business is impacted. Or a child interprets the lack of follow through as if their needs or desires don’t matter and grows up having relational trust issues.
Instead, we desire to be the reliable one. You know that person too, think of them now. I just did and smiled and noticed a sense of ease come over me. Why? Because there is safety and rest found in any relationship with a person who has this type of character. They are a person of integrity who is dependable to do what is right, no matter the cost or convenience.
Jesus is the only perfect example of someone of infallible character. A person whose moral and ethical principles are unchanging—the model for integrity. Everyone else falls somewhere on the spectrum and is a work in progress. It takes GRIT to become a person of integrity. A long commitment with unwavering perseverance in honesty, accountability, and dependability.
These actions shape (or reshape) the core of character and character is often revealed by the words we choose. Jesus points this out too saying, “Let what you say be simply ‘Yes’ or ‘No’; anything more than this comes from evil” (Matthew 5:37). An evil character embellishes and their words can’t be taken at face value. But words from a person of integrity can be trusted. James, the brother of Jesus and follower post-resurrection, wrote that someone who can control their tongue is fully developed in character and can control their entire body (James 3:2). He saw that integrity to the very end when Jesus did what He said he was going to do and died innocent, rose in glory, and ascended to heaven.
Friends, what we say matters. What we do matters. Doing what you say you’re going to do matters because we represent Jesus. So let’s commit with grit to doing that well to bring Him the honor due to His name.
Jessica Klootwyk
Discipleship Director
Words Matter
“And don’t say anything you don’t mean. This counsel is embedded deep in our traditions. You only make things worse when you lay down a smoke screen of pious talk, saying, ‘I’ll pray for you,’ and never doing it, or saying, ‘God be with you,’ and not meaning it. You don’t make your words true by embellishing them with religious lace. In making your speech sound more religious, it becomes less true. Just say ‘yes’ and ‘no.’ When you manipulate words to get your way, you go wrong. THE MSG Matthew 5:33-37
I like this version of scripture in Matthew because it speaks to all of us to glorify God, not ourselves, and mean what you say, and say what you mean.
Psalm 19:14 says, Let the words of my mouth and meditation of my heart be acceptable in your sight O Lord. Speaking with “religiosity” or “religious lace” as Matthew calls it just makes it less true. Jesus is saying let your true heart be reflected in your speech.
Jesus said, ”But I say to you that for every idle word men may speak, they will give an account of it in the day of judgment. For by your words, you will be justified, and by your words, you will be condemned.”
Sometimes in the moment, people want to say the right thing or they are afraid they will say the wrong thing, so they embellish or just say nothing, but we will all be accountable.
“For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks” (Matthew 12:34).
What we say should bring God glory, not glorify us. Making promises we probably won’t keep, or saying we will pray for someone and then not doing it—those things hurt God’s heart and don’t make us trustworthy. The secret to victory over anything in your life is closeness to Jesus — intimacy with Him!
Father, help me and us to be a reflection of you and your love in all we do and say.
Deb Hill
Executive Assistant
Your Honor, My Honor?
Alex and I swore to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. But as followers of Christ, we strive to only deal in truth all the time. Among people of faith, there should be no need for oaths. Jesus teaches us the folly of swearing and taking oaths. Anything more than 'yes' or 'no' is unnecessary and comes from evil. When I first encountered this teaching, I had to change my habit of adding “I promise!” to statements. Even now, I sometimes find myself creatively emphasizing my 'yeses.' It's tricky! Our sinful nature desperately wants to hedge bets and secure trust with more than just truth.
Our legal systems are built around the fear of consequences of all kinds of severity. Trust works in the world if everyone is controlled by a baseline fear. It is all too natural to use each other’s fears to assuage our doubts—and we call that trust. We’ve built huge industries around it, too, with a huge variety of attorneys. Leave it to the world to monetize the truth.
If any of you has a dispute with another, do you dare to take it before the ungodly for judgment instead of before the Lord’s people? ... The very fact that you have lawsuits among you means you have been completely defeated already. Why not rather be wronged? Why not rather be cheated?
1 Corinthians 6:1, 7
But our trustworthiness, at its core, is grounded in love. We have received the fulfilling love of Christ, and so we don’t need assurances from each other. We seek the genuine betterment of the other because we are family. We can open ourselves up to personal loss without needing to guard our words or ourselves. We can love each other sacrificially as Christ loved us!
Jonathan Duncan
EFCC Member
Prone to Wander
On a hike wandering off-grid can be intentional. Guilty as charged! I am one of those hikers who wants to explore the potential of a good un-marked detour. Some of the best mountain views I’ve seen have been discovered that way, but my wonder of ‘what else could be out there’ has led me to places where the only way out was to turn around.
In-kind, there is a way that God has laid out for us that leads to flourishing and blessing, but we are prone to wander off that path. He set markers such as “Do not commit adultery” to help guide our steps toward the good life that is found in His ways. The sin of lust can lead to ‘what else could be out there’ and we wander onto paths that are destructive to many lives. While the consequences of the detour can’t be avoided, there is always the opportunity to turn around.
If you find yourself wandering down paths on the internet, television, or even in literature that are bringing temptation, make a drastic change—NOW! Please delete the account, television, or library card and tell someone about it. Have someone look you in the eye, hold you accountable, and walk with you toward healing and wholeness. And if you’ve already stepped into sin, it’s never too late to pursue the freedom that confession brings to your soul. If we can help you with that, reach out. Our Care & Counseling Department is here to help. Visit www.efcc.org/need-help/ and find someone full of the love of Jesus and equipped for the journey.
Jessica Klootwyk
Discipleship Director
Nobody’s Fault But Mine
28 But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart. 29 If your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body be thrown into hell. - Matthew 5:28-29
I love how Jesus confronts real issues without beating around the bush. He knows his audience is mostly men and he also knows that lust is a problem that all men face. However, I just want to point out how the one Man who was able to go through life, seeing the same women that every other man saw, without ever looking at a woman with lustful intent, knew where the problem with lust really lies. Jesus puts the blame squarely where it should be, on the man with the wandering eye.
Let’s stop and appreciate how rare this is… especially in religious contexts. Think about how many religious traditions handle the problem of lust. Unfortunately, most of them handle lust by blaming the woman. Sometimes women are forced (either by actual laws or by social mores) to cover themselves completely (i.e. the Muslim burqa). They are told, in not-so-subtle terms, that their bodies are too much of a temptation for men and that it is their job to hide their bodies so as not to cause men to sin. These traditions place all of the restrictions on women and assume that if they just stopped showing themselves, men would stop lusting. However, they forget that Eskimos still lust.
The way that Jesus handles this is so very different! He doesn’t follow the typical religious playbook. He doesn’t blame women. He puts the blame squarely where it belongs: on the man with a lust problem. Jesus notices that it is the man’s fault for looking with lustful intent, not the woman’s fault for being beautiful. He doesn’t tell the woman to cover up, he tells the man to “cut out” the problem. We know that Jesus didn’t want anyone cutting out their eyes or hands, but he did want men to know they could deal with their own problems. He is telling men that they need to learn how to control their own bodies. Period.
The overarching truth is that the only one to blame for my sin is me, whatever that sin may be. I cannot blame anyone else. I am the one who will stand before God, so I am the one who must learn how to control my mind and body. This is a truth that men and women need to learn equally. We all deal with our temptations, but the truth is the same, sin is nobody’s fault but mine.
Josh Rose
Family Pastor
Truth or Consequences
As a mom of three boys, I wanted to protect them from the harsher realities of life, but also let them learn the consequences of their actions. I didn’t enjoy the trips to the ER for stitches etc. when they went rogue, but hoped they learned something in the process. It was sometimes impossible to protect them from themselves or life but knowing that God was in control helped, he loved them more than I did.
What does this have to do with Matthew 5? Why was it necessary to talk about the consequences of lust so graphically? As our loving Father, he wants to protect us, but he also wants us to know that there are consequences when we make choices that harm ourselves and others. And here he wants us to see that there is a progression from what we see, to what we think and then what we do. God as our loving father knows the consequences of the progression of sin and loss of self-control, while we deceive ourselves. (James 1:22)
He wants us to see the seriousness of the problem. He wants us to grasp that our eyes and hands aren’t the “cause” of the sin; the real problem is in our hearts. (James 4:8) God accomplishes this by pouring the Spirit of His Son into our hearts.
Jesus is saying we should be willing to give up whatever is necessary to protect ourselves from the consequences of an evil, adulterous heart.
Listen to what C.S.Lewis says in his classic work,"Mere Christianity". . .
“After each failure, ask forgiveness, pick yourself up, and try again. Very often, what God first helps us towards is not the virtue itself but just this power of always trying again. For however important chastity (or courage or truthfulness, or any other virtue) may be, this process trains us in habits of the soul which are more important still. It curses our illusions about ourselves and teaches us to depend upon God. We learn, on the one hand, that we cannot trust ourselves, even in our best moments, and, on the other, that we need not despair even in our worst, for our failures are forgiven. The only fatal thing is to sit down content with anything less than perfection." (Mere C. in 'The Best of CSL' p.482)
God wants the best for you. He doesn’t want you to stay stuck in shame, embarrassment, or bitterness. He isn’t going to turn a deaf ear when you mess up if you are sincerely sorry and ask for his forgiveness and help. Most of us know this, but Father please give us the courage and wisdom to share it with those who don’t.
Deb Hill
Executive Assistant
Provision and Protection through Faithfulness
What God says and does reflects who he is. His words and actions flow out of his character, his being, his very self. This includes the rules, laws, and expectations he gives to people.
Consider these questions and answers:
Why is it wrong to lie? Because God is truth.
Why is hate so dangerous? Because God is love.
Why is envy harmful to one’s spirit? Because God is content.
Why does unfaithfulness cause so much relational pain? Because God is always faithful, breaking faith hurts and harms.
God’s principles for humanity flow from his character. When people break his principles, it brings trouble and hurt. God’s principles flow from his person. Trusting him and living by his principles (rules, laws, expectations) brings protection and provision.
In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus teaches that God’s faithfulness should be lived out in actions and thoughts. Not just, “Don’t commit adultery” (Ten Commandment #7 Deut 5:18), but “Don’t even think about committing adultery” (Matt 5:27-28.) Faithfulness is so important to a healthy life, that Jesus encourages taking drastic steps to avoid looking at or acting out sins of unfaithfulness (Matt 5:29-30.) “Chop off a hand” or “gouge out an eye” are exaggerated statements meant to emphasize the importance of doing drastic things to cut out patterns of sin. Making drastic changes to promote faithfulness in mind and deed isn’t necessary just because God made an arbitrary rule about it. God’s expectations follow and flow from his person and character. Trusting God, being faithful to him, and living faithfully in words, thoughts, and deeds reflect his character and bring protection and provision.
Pastor John Riley
Does my marriage display the Gospel?
Jesus said in Matthew 5:27 “You’ve heard that it was said, You shall not commit adultery.” He was quoting Moses who was quoting God way back in Exodus 20:14 when the Law was given at Mt. Sinai. Rules God gave to his people, the nation of Israel, were meant to reflect His holiness and to keep them safe. Though restrictive, the command was for their good—God had their best interest in mind. The heart of this commandment was directed at protecting the sanctity of the home—the goodness of marriage, family, the fundamental building blocks of society. The marriage vow was holy, a covenantal commitment made before God. And because God is faithful and longs to see his children live faithfully, this command upholds sexual faithfulness as supremely important to God.
But that was a long long time ago, right? I mean…times have changed, and lots of things have changed since “Thou shall not commit adultery.” Do you ever wonder, why is it that Jesus cares what we do sexually? I mean, that’s pretty private stuff, that’s my business, why is Jesus concerned with what happens in the bedroom?
Lord God Almighty, who is holy, holy, holy, created sex. He thought it up and invented it on purpose for our enjoyment and his glory. God designed marriage to be between a man and a woman but his purpose for marriage goes WAY beyond a bride and groom’s mutual happiness. The purpose of marriage is to put the greatest love story in the world on display, the story of a love so great that it would sacrifice for you, and even die for you.
God, who IS LOVE (1 John 4) wanted the world to see a small glimpse of himself. Done God’s way, marriage is an incredible platform to display the beauty of God’s faithfulness, and love. He created man and woman to become one flesh—so intimately unified in mind, body and spirit that the construct of marriage would be like a billboard to an aching world that there is a love like that. There is a love that is faithful, forgiving, slow to anger, a love that says, “I will never leave you, I will never forsake you”, a love that abhors adultery, a love that lasts.
In Matthew 19, Jesus reminds the teachers of the law, “at the beginning the Creator made them male and female and said, “for this reason, a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife and the two shall become one flesh, so they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together let man not separate.
Donielle Winter
EFCC Member
Leave Your Gift
I could feel a wave of heat rising up my face as I gripped the steering wheel tightly. I began to mutter frustrations under my breath, and then I saw where the car had turned. The person who had just run the stop sign, nearly hitting me, had turned right into the church parking lot. I wanted to roll down my window and yell something like "You fool!" I wanted them to acknowledge what had just happened, I wanted them to understand their mistake.
As I parked, my frustration turned into anger, but then God intervened. I watched the person get out of their car and realized it was someone I knew and cared for deeply. In that moment, the anger dissipated, the frustration subsided, and I quickly confessed my sins to my Savior. Can you relate?
We sometimes think that leaving our gifts applies only when we are about to take communion or give an offering or even when we arrive at church. However, God wants us to recognize that we are to leave our gifts and go make things right whenever possible. Whether we have committed a wrongdoing or someone else has wronged us, Jesus tells us to attempt to reconcile.
Do not bring your anger as a gift before our Heavenly Father. Instead, honor him by making peace. This is a valuable reminder for us today. If you go on social media, you will see comments that are angry and often hurtful. You will see division among people who should be united. You will see how certain viewpoints distract people from the Great Commission and focus on something that does not contribute to our calling. Thinking about these things makes me realize where I should put my focus and attention.
Jesus masterfully tells us to stop and try to fix things. He knows our hearts and cares so much for us that he would rather have us mend a broken relationship than give a gift in anger. We have a wise and good Savior!
Of course, this is not always easy, but Jesus did many difficult things too. Let's do our best to follow his words. If you have wronged someone, go make it right. If someone has wronged you, go make it right. Take a moment to read Matthew 5:23-24 and see what Jesus tells you. Praying for you all!
Pastor Jeremy Johnson
Reconciliation. JUST DO IT.
“This is how I want you to conduct yourself in these matters. If you enter your place of worship and are about to make an offering, you suddenly remember a grudge a friend has against you, abandon your offering, leave immediately, go to this friend, and make things right. Then and only then, come back and work things out with God.
Make things right. The NIV uses the phrase, “go and be reconciled” but the idea is the same. Easier said than done because bruised or broken relationships are painful. Sometimes the blame is mine….and deep down I know it, but I’d rather ignore it. Sometimes the blame is on the other person—it’s really and truly NOT my fault. Usually, though, blame is shared between 2 people, and there are hurt feelings, harsh words, and plenty of stubbornness to go around.
Whatever the case, Jesus says to reconcile and make things right. Beatitudes echo in my mind, “Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy”; “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God.” Mending that broken relationship ASAP honors God more than any other “act of worship”.
He’s a God of reconciliation, he loves making broken things beautiful.
At one point, my sin prevented me from having a relationship with God. But Jesus’ willing and perfect sacrifice on the cross, made things right. Jesus solved my sin problem. His death reconciled me into a restored relationship with a holy God. My sin made me God’s enemy, but because of what Jesus did I can now be called God’s friend! He reconciled you and me so that we might be “ministers of reconciliation” (2 Corinthians 5). My job is to tell others how Jesus brought me into a right relationship with God, and how he wants that for every single human being.
But how can I go and be a “minister of reconciliation” to a lost world if I neglect to restore a relationship with a friend?
John 3:16 is the message of reconciliation—God so loved the world that he sent his Son so that we might believe and not perish. What a merciful gift it is to be reconciled to God. Just like any parent, God is delighted when his kids love one another and when they get along like good friends. And when they don’t?—He wants his kids to forgive fast, reconcile, and make things right.
Is there someone you need to show mercy to today? A relational divide God wants you to reconcile and make things right.
Jesus says “Follow me, be like me; I love reconciliation—making things new, making things right.”
Donielle Winter EFCC Member