Guilt or Shame
When I was 10 years old, I picked up some stones and threw them at a dog. Some boys saw me. I was afraid they would tell my dad. Instead of confessing to my dad, I suffered in fear which turned into shame. I never did confess. Whenever I remembered that incident, I always felt ashamed.
There is a difference between guilt and shame. Guilt is an appropriate response to doing something wrong. Shame makes you feel like there is something wrong with you.
God has provided a way for us to deal with guilt. 1 John 1:9 says, “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins…” Confession is admitting that we are guilty of a specific sin. If I had done that when I first threw stones, I probably would have been spared years of shame.
The Prodigal son was guilty of sinning. His comment to his father, “I am no longer worthy to be called your son” indicates he was ashamed as well. Unlike me, he went to his father and confessed, “Father, I have sinned...” That opened the door for his father to forgive, love, accept, and restore him. Since shame is a feeling, being assured we are loved and accepted can help to overcome shame.
God will forgive and remove the guilt of your sin, because Jesus has already been punished for your sins. When you take God at His word and believe you are forgiven, you can leave shame behind.
If you are holding onto guilt over a sin you have committed, believe that God will forgive you when you confess. Go to him as the Prodigal son did, even with his feelings of unworthiness. You do not need to feel worthy or shameless to go to God. He will respond with forgiveness, healing, and restoration.
If shame is a result of something done to you, you are not guilty. It is important to distinguish between guilt and shame. It may take counseling to overcome that kind of shame. Be kind to yourself and seek counsel.
Sharon Chapman
Come As You Are
I relate far more to the older brother than the younger one. As a child, I was indignant when my younger brother didn’t show gratitude and irritated when my little sister got away with actions and attitudes that I would never dare to express. I lived most of my childhood years as the perfect “older brother”; not squandering a thing. Yet something inside of me yearned to be accepted for who I really was. I knew my thoughts and the sinful attitudes that existed deep within my soul. On the outside I portrayed the pious older sibling; self-righteous, exhibiting a perfect exterior. But on the inside, I was crying out for love and acceptance, regardless of whether or not I “messed up”. It wasn’t that my parents had ever offered anything but love, yet somehow I felt a need to prove myself worthy. What would it have been like to be real? To honestly express my frustration and bitterness?
The younger brother didn’t hesitate. He lived it up, squandered all he had and then came groveling back home. He fully recognized his sin and had no expectation of regaining his right as an heir. He humbly presented himself before his father, requesting to be treated not as a son, but as a hired hand. In Luke 15:18-19 he says, “Father, I have sinned against heaven and before you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son. Treat me as one of your hired servants.” He named his sins, knowing his father’s loving character, but not knowing what life would look like moving forward. He must have felt an intense amount of freedom as he came to his father as he truly was; not as who he aspired to be, but as himself, in all of his brokenness and despair.
Repentance in our world does not always bring about acceptance, forgiveness, and restoration. But that is not the case with our Heavenly Father. Our confidence in honest repentance and seeking forgiveness is that the Father always welcomes us home. Oh, he doesn’t just leave the door unlocked, but he runs to us and pursues us in our brokenness because he longs to restore us to a whole and sweet relationship with him. Henri Nouwen says, “Receiving forgiveness requires a total willingness to let God be God and do all the healing, restoring, and renewing.” This forgiveness does not depend on us. Our Father is inviting us to come just as we are and he will run to us with open arms.
Lynette Fuson
Care & Counseling Director
The Patient Father
The amazing patience shown by the father waiting and hoping for the prodigal son to come to his senses and return home is a beautiful picture of God’s patience toward us. God has been displaying his patience with all humanity ever since creation. The Bible tells us that in the Garden of Eden, at the dawn of creation, Adam and Eve enjoyed regular communion with God their Creator. But later, when Adam and Eve succumbed to the lies of the tempter and fell into sin, they actually tried to hide from God. Even so their loving Creator looked for them and waited for them to come out of hiding. Although sin had disrupted the fellowship they once had with their Creator, God graciously mapped out an amazing plan to redeem a fallen human race that would span thousands and thousands of years. It was a plan that required God’s only begotten son, Jesus Christ, to shed his blood and die for the sins of fallen humanity upon a cruel cross.
The Lord continues to wait patiently for people everywhere to respond to His offer of forgiveness and trust in Christ’s sacrifice on the cross. His patience continues in our own lifetime. The Apostle Peter spoke about God’s incredible patience when he wrote “do not overlook this one fact, beloved, that with the Lord one day is as a thousand years, and a thousand years as one day. The Lord is not slow to fulfill his promise as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing that any should perish, but that all should reach repentance.” (2 Peter 3:8-9, ESV)
How has our Heavenly Father demonstrated patience toward you over the years? Have you thanked Him for being so patient? Is there some way that the Lord is calling you to extend more patience and grace to an obstinate family member, neighbor or friend? Remember the story of the prodigal son and how the gentle patience of that father was eventually rewarded. Our patient God is still in the business of changing hearts.
Dave Korinek
Congregational Care
Desperado
In 1973 Don Henley and Glenn Frey of the Eagles collaborated on a song by the name of Desperado. In case you don’t know, a desperado is, among other things, a desperate man. The opening lines of the song go something like this, “Desperado, why don’t you come to your senses…And freedom, oh, freedom well that's just some people talking, your prison is walking through this world all alone.”
Sounds a lot like the younger son in Luke 15:17-20, doesn’t it? By this time in his life it’s quite safe to say that he’s desperate and that he has some major decisions to make, not the least of which is - What is he going to do with his hunger?
That’s a decision we all have to make when we are struggling and broken, isn’t it? And while the text mentions only a physical hunger, we know there has to be a relational and spiritual hunger in his life as well. It’s safe to say that he’s hungry and desperate on every level.
So what do we do with our pain and our hunger? What do you do with yours? As Henley and Frey continue their song, they write this, “Your pain and your hunger, they’re driving you home…” Sounds like the younger son, doesn’t it?
The answer to the question of, “What do I do in my desperation?” is, “You go home.” You go home to God, to your heavenly Father, to your loving Lord. (But you only will if you believe some things to be true of Him and if you are willing to believe some things to be true of yourself. We will talk more about those later in the week.)
As Desperado wraps up, Henley and Frey write this - “Desperado, why don't you come to your senses, come down from your fences, open the gate…You better let somebody love you before it’s too late.”
If you have been living far away from God, or farther away than you would like, then today’s application is to let Him love you before it’s too late. No one who has made that decision has ever regretted it, and you won’t either.
Scott Smith
Care Pastor
Longing for a Far Country?
“the younger son gathered all he had and took a journey into a far country…”
Luke 15:13a
Throughout human history, the phenomenon of migration has impacted the lives of millions of people around the world. People make the decision and move to different countries for different reasons, but the vast majority of them migrate to avoid suffering. Most immigrants leave behind relatives, possessions, and pretty much everything they love in order to seek better life opportunities for themselves and their families.
In this parable, we see a young man decide to go on a journey to live as an immigrant in a foreign country. The motivations of this young man to leave his country of origin were not to escape a difficult, chaotic or dangerous environment, but to pursue a life of pleasure away from his father’s influence. Up to this point, the prodigal son lived a very pleasant life in his home country and in the company of his father, but he was not content. Apparently, there was an emptiness in his soul that led him to start paying attention to the rumors of a better way of experiencing life. So, without much thought, the prodigal son gathered all he had and left his home country in pursuit of happiness.
We don’t know how long he lived as a foreigner, but what we do know is that he wasted everything he had living recklessly. He was left with no other option but to look for a job in order to survive. Fortunately, this young man found a job, but he couldn’t find any food. At the time, the whole country was going through a severe famine. The prodigal son ended up hungry and alone. He was experiencing the reality of being apart from the provision, care, love, protection, and instruction of his father. The fact of the matter is that this young man had everything he needed in his father’s house, but his discontentment came as he started distancing himself from his father’s heart. As the story progresses, the prodigal son came to his senses and was able to recognize and value the beautiful companionship and character of his father. In the end, he realized the longing he felt in his soul to start a new life in a different place was not as fulfilling as his longing to enjoy the company and guidance of his father.
I think one of the lessons that we can learn from this parable is to make sure we don’t get distracted by our desires to do life on our own, but to learn to delight in the company of our Heavenly Father as we go through the good and the bad experiences in life.
Esteban Tapia
Teaching Pastor
Free Will or Control
We desperately crave to be known and understood deep in our souls. Yet, we also struggle with wanting independence and our own way. We want to navigate our own journey and sometimes learn lessons the hard way. I think that’s why our souls find so much comfort in the parable of the Prodigal Son.
Having parented for two decades I find myself identifying with the father in this parable. I had to giggle at myself when I read verses 12-13, “The younger one said to his father, “Father, give me my share of the estate.” So he divided his property between them. Not long after that, the younger son got together all he had, set off for a distant country and there squandered his wealth in wild living.”
If I were to rewrite this, it would say,“so the younger son asked for his half, and the mom, out of her parental concern, asked 100 questions, warned of making foolish decisions, and then placed some healthy boundaries.”
Please tell me you’re giggling because you’d do the same! Apparently, the father divided the money and let him go. There seem to be no words or pleading from the father. He released control, allowed the son to experience his own journey, and learn some life lessons. Ooof..... that can be hard because we want to protect our loved ones from pain and hardship. We involve ourselves deeper and give ourselves more responsibility than we were meant to carry. This helps me understand free will in a deeper way and with a more tender heart. God has given us direction and truth for our own good, yet allows us to make decisions whether we make them good or bad.
We love the people in our lives and want to protect them. Sharing wisdom and truth is part of a healthy relationship. But we need to remember God has an individual calling and journey for each of us. Our responsibility is to share the truth in love. Then we pray and allow the Holy Spirit to work. Will those we love make bad choices sometimes? Sure! But the Holy Spirit will work in their life and our constant love will be a gift of grace.
When we release our control in others' lives, we take ourselves and our desires out of the equation, and trust our Heavenly Father. Sometimes the journey back to Jesus is slow, but forgiveness is always immediate. God loves our loved ones more than we can comprehend and we can trust His plan and journey for their lives.
Bonnie Nichols
A Heart for those Lured Away
One of the reasons I am a Pastor today is because of a guy named Otis who was a missionary with a youth outreach ministry called Young Life. Their purpose is to equip and send adults onto High School campuses with the good news of Jesus. Otis was nearly 26 years old when I first met him, but I was pretty confident that he was borderline elderly! We may have only been 10 years apart, but to a 16-year-old boy, that might as well be an eternity. And yet, Otis persisted in pursuing me and my group of very lost friends. Eventually, after a lot of hard work and persistence, my friends and I learned to respect Otis, even if we didn’t listen to the talks that he tried to give at our weekly meetings that Young Life called “Club.”
One day, after months of diligent outreach, Otis picked me up from school. It happened to be a few days after he noticed I came to Club high, so it was an extra long and awkwardly quiet drive to his house that day. After parking his car, he turned to me and asked me a question I’ll never forget. He said, “Josh, what are you doing?” That was it. However, to me, it was as if he had shared the four spiritual laws on top of the Romans Road because my heart was convicted. I knew that I had disappointed Otis, but I also knew that he loved me anyway and wanted what was best for me. Right then and there, I realized that I needed to change and I have been living for Jesus ever since.
Otis didn’t need to preach me a sermon because by that point he knew I had heard more Christian sermons than most people get to hear in a lifetime. You see, I wasn’t the typical lost kid who didn’t know Jesus, I was a prodigal. I ran away from my faith even though I’d received all the advantages of a loving Christ-centered, evangelical, Christian home. My parents loved me well! They took me to church on Sundays, then on Sunday nights, and then we went back again on Wednesdays just in case. I was a veritable connoisseur of Christian summer camps. I responded to more old-fashioned altar calls than I can remember. But none of that seemed to matter when I was 16. I was lured away by “a far country.”
I honestly don’t know where I would be if God had not sent Otis into my world with such grace and patience . . . with such a heart for prodigals. Do you know any prodigals who have been lured away from their faith? Maybe God wants to use you in their life today. My encouragement to you is to have patience. Spend time getting to know them. They probably don’t need another sermon. Instead, love them, and when they mess up, don’t rub it in their face, but maybe just take the time to ask them how they are doing. Maybe then, the kindness of God, as revealed through your kindness, will lead them to repentance (Romans 2:4).
Josh Rose
Discipleship Pastor
Thieves of Joy
Have you ever belly-laughed at a silly pet video or teared up watching the testimony of someone who came to faith in Jesus? At its best, social media has had a positive impact on building community, fostering relationships, sparking joyful moments, and inspiring people toward creativity and acts of kindness.
Many social apps open windows into the lives of our friends, celebrities, and random people around the world, giving us a chance to endlessly scroll and live vicariously through them. Sometimes this seemingly innocuous activity has the ability to evoke 1) a sense of FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out), and 2) feelings of comparison. The content we consume can create discontentment in our hearts, creating thoughts that who we’re with, where we are, and what we’re doing just isn’t good enough.
The Younger Son (prodigal) had serious FOMO and comparison issues. He thought his best life was out in the world, partying and squandering away his wealth, away from his loving father who provided for all his needs. Even today, some people may believe living life to the fullest looks like quitting your job on a whim, seeing every country in the world, falling recklessly in love, and trying every new experience.
Augustine once said that our hearts are restless until they find rest in the One who made it. Our fleshly hearts and desires will always be chasing the whims of the world, never feeling content, purposeful, or satisfied - until we run into the arms of our loving Father. He promises us the fullness of His joy.
"Every minute we spend focusing on comparing ourselves with others and trying to be more or less like them is time we are distracted from the work Christ desires to do in us to make us more like Him. Comparison is a heavy burden to carry. It puts the focus on replicating personality rather than embracing identity. When we allow the Father to release us from the bondage of comparison, we can live in freedom to be transformed by His kindness and mercy.
- Heather Fallis
Lord, help us to not be distracted by FOMO or comparison, but let us continually be focused on Your mission of love.
KP
An Inheritance Squandered
“…and there he squandered his property in reckless living.” -Luke 15:13b
“He longed to fill his stomach with the pods that the pigs were eating,
but no one gave him anything.” -Luke 15:16
Jesus paints a vivid image of this younger son's journey from abundance, and excess to utter need and desperation. From the comfort of his father's home to the allure and decadence of the far country leading down into indentured servitude with the swine.
When I read through the Parable of the Prodigal Son, I usually quickly wrap up this part of the story to get to the happier parts of Jesus' story. Why would we want to dwell on such a wretched existence? I have never received an enormous amount of wealth from my earthly parents, and I cannot relate to spending time rolling around with pigs desperately hoping to eat whatever they have been gobbling up. The Pharisees listening to Jesus tell this story also would have felt a disconnect with this foolish young man’s experience. One of their thoughts (and even mine) may have been that this son simply got what he deserved. If you are going to waste all you have and disrespect your family of origin, what else should you expect but isolation and destruction?
The reality is that, yes, our sin does separate us from the Father. Paul put it this way in Ephesians 2:1-3, And you were dead in the trespasses and sins in which you once walked…carrying out the desires of the body and the mind, and were by nature children of wrath, like the rest of mankind.
God gave each one of us an amazing inheritance. He created us in His image, gave us a wonderful world to enjoy, and each one of us has told Him that our way is better. I was dead in trespasses and the sins and apart from His goodness, I still would be dead in my trespasses and sins!
I’ve grown to love the story of the Prodigal Son because it reminds me of my deep need for God’s grace in my life. Apart from His gentle, life-giving kindness, I would still be living a life separated from my Creator!
How does this truth shape the way we view and act toward those around us? Is there someone in your life that needs to hear a life-giving word from you today? May we love and see others the way our loving Father does - precious in His sight and worth rescuing!
Tim Mitchell
Welcome Specialist
Choose God
When I gave my life to Christ in 1999 I had no idea who or what I was giving my life to. I soon realized that in order to experience any significant life changes, I would actually have to do things differently. Poor decisions in life can often cause major setbacks. In a life led by Christ, he will allow us to make choices that don’t always line up with his will for our life; or perhaps they do. In Luke 15 Jesus tells the parable of the prodigal son who told his Father to give him the share he had coming, so the Father divided the assets to both sons.
We know that the younger of the two sons left and squandered his inheritance, however, the Father was filled with compassion when he finally came home. I often say “sometimes I make the wrong choice before I make the right one.” When Adam and Eve sinned, they hid from God among the trees in the garden of Eden. God is the one who pursued and came after them, "the LORD God called to the man" (Genesis 3:8–9).
Whether my decision or choice is right or wrong, God is always there for me. He had a perfect design for us from the beginning and gave his own son to die for our sins. We will always be challenged with making decisions or choices, and Jesus will always be with us to help us and refine us through the good and the bad decisions we make in life.
Throughout the Bible, we see the ongoing charge for us to pursue God and we see the story of Him pursuing us. In Jeremiah 29:13 God tells the Israelites, "You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart."
God loves us, always pursues us, and we can choose to be caught. The best choice I ever made was to choose Jesus and make him the Lord of my life.
Randy Carter
Inside Maintenance Director
